Leah’s Cafe

What do you think/feel about co-signing or be a guarantor?

My uncle recently had to learn the hard lesson, he co-signed for a car with his son, and he defaulted. If seems when you co-sign a loan, you are playing Russian roulette with your financial life. If the person you sign with defaults, the bank will come after you. If the bank wants a co-signer, usually it’s because they know that signer won’t pay. So don’t be shocked when this comes back to bite you.

When I was teaching at the private university, I was asked by a few students to be the guarantor for their student loans. I did sign for a couple of them thinking that it’s no big deal. But, now I think about it, it was quite foolish to do so, wasn’t it? Good thing they have not brought me any financial havoc.

I could understand why my friend Dianne won’t co-sign on a loan for her son, though her son was furious with her. He’s furious with her because he’s a spoiled brat who doesn’t like being told no. I think my friend made a very good choice to not co-sign on a loan for this guy. He’s 26 years old, and it’s about time he heard the word “no” about something. Right now, he’s using borrowed money to go to Japan … GIMME A BREAK!

I volunteer for a couple of hours a week at Agape Care, a non profit organization that helps single parents, unwed mothers and elderly. I help out at the after school care for children of single parents. The children are from broken families, their parents are divorced or separated. The center provides a safe place and food for them during after school hours and before their single parents got off work. It’s also aims to ease the financial burden of putting the children at commercially run after school care, which doesn’t come cheap. Majority of them lived with their grandparents who have very little financial means. Some single mothers are working at demanding jobs to make ends meet, they don’t have energy left to supervise their children’s homework or to raise their children for that matter.

I met a new boy who just came in today, he is 6 years old, he has never been to preschool, he doesn’t know ABC or 123! His father is a truck driver, he travels with his job and left the little boy with an invalid grandmother. They have no financial mean and no one was there to take him to school, that’s why he didn’t go to school.

It’s very sad that children often become the victims of divorces and center of battles over child custody, support, and visitation. The fights prior to and during the divorce affects this children emotionally in ways that parents don’t always realize. Losing the lifestyle that they are used to, now living with stressed out single moms, and having reduced resources for everything they used to do as a family can be very traumatic to most children.

Yes, it’s true that we can’t change the fact that their parents are separated, but we can give this children unconditional love and support to help ease their adjustments. Since every child reacts differently to divorce, the single mom or dad inevitably face much stress in raising them. They need support too.